Try not to be too disturbed by this, but most of the right wing ranting seems to sound like most of the stories printed at that site about US Politics.
After that disclaimer:
Illuminati celebrate election victory
Obama said his pyramidal hat was simply comfortable
Just hours after his re-election, Obama was taken in a black helicopter to Illuminati headquarters where he was greeted with applause and a banner saying ‘Way to go, mind-control puppet!’
An Illuminati spokesman said: “This is a great moment for America, or as it will soon be known, Population Containment Area 2.
“With Obama back in power we can continue our secret project to enslave humanity and put Illuminati symbols in obscure places where they will only be noticed by conspiracy wingnuts.
“We’ll probably force everyone to be tattooed with a barcode too, although that’s less of an issue now that all their personal details are on Facebook.”
Obama has dismissed the Illuminati’s existence as “conspiracy theory nonsense”, saying he wanted to concentrate on real issues such as the economy, healthcare and compulsory microchips for all Americans.
He said: “My proposal to make ownership of tin foil a capital offence has nothing to do with its microwave-blocking properties. I just happen to think clingfilm keeps your sandwiches fresher.”
Democrat voter Carolyn Ryan said: “As a liberal, I’m a bit disappointed that a vote for Obama was a vote for a secret network of concentration camps to exterminate undesirable elements in society.
“Still, anything’s better than Romney. Four more years!”
Note; I am not taking any credit for this, you morons-
Lmao you probably won't be cracking so many jokes when your family's safety and your future are being threatened by our soon to be communist government. But the comfortable hat wise-crack made me chuckle...
ReplyDeleteTaigen, welcome to penigma -- I'm laughing now at people who make predictions like that.
ReplyDeleteWe are at exactly ZERO risk of becoming a communist government. And this was the perfect satire to describe people who think we are, who fear a one world government, etc.
The reality is that those governments and economies which are a combination of what the right here likes to call socialism and capitalism ARE the most successful and efficient. They provide every bit as much real freedom to their citizens as we do - maybe more; but they ALSO provide better educations, better health care services and results. People live better, longer, healthier. Their economies are more stable, they tend to be less exposed and vulnerable to economic volatility (booms and busts) and have generally much better working conditions, wages and salaries, and a far less dramatic wage and income gap between a 1% and their 99% -- in other words they are more equitable societies. They have lower drug use, fewer unplanned pregnancies, and far fewer incidents of firearms violence.
What they DO also have is the same freedom of religion (or from them if that is the individual preference), the same freedom of speech and often MORE freedom of assembly, the same freedom of the press, the same or broader freedom of one person/ one vote for representative government, the same property rights, and a better broader freedom of family and marriage. They have similar, and in some cases better, freedom of privacy.
They are just as safe, if not more so, from external threats and from internal threats as well, of violence or despotic / authoritarian governments as we are.
So perhaps you should focus on why you appear to be so paranoid and ill-informed that you think we are about to become a communist government. Because intelligent and educated people from formerly communist governments laugh at that prospect. The reality is that every communist government in the world is instead becoming more capitalistic, more like us, and more free, as they go through their own cultural and governmental evolution rather than revolution.
I have more faith in our ability to change those governments, by example, to be more like us, than fears of our changing to be more like them, because we are the more successful example.
Taigen, you are part of the reason the US is taken as a joke.
ReplyDeleteYou seem to have missed that this comes from a satirical site.
'Nuf said?